Seriously? You’ve wasted entire national elections because…?

I’m mortified to have only just now learned that the Green Party doesn’t bother to field candidates for local elections. And yet they still expect to win the trust of an entire population after not having bothered to do the years of work required to participate in a system at the presidential level.

I can only conclude that they don’t really want to do that work at all. Especially after having nominated someone who’s even less qualified than Nader was.

No specifics about how their “policies” will be funded. Just platitudes. They’re not even committed to acquiring power for themselves. They’re just hogging camera time.


Just do it right the first time.

I remember a temp print production gig in a previous decade, working at a small agency alongside a terrific designer who did elaborate print forms for a single big client that eventually took all their work in-house. This guy designed typefaces and did elaborate calligraphy, and I loved chatting with him about stuff like that.

As the new guy, I was tasked with making corrections to pieces that had already been set up, until such time as I could be trusted to make new stuff.

This guy’s form layouts were a dense thicket of impossibly overlapping tiny text boxes, tiny empty frames which only contained color, and tiny line objects. No paragraph styles to speak of. No indication that the designer had used the software’s capabilities to make repetitive work easier. All ad hoc. All inflicted pain.

Years later, I realized what that meant.

I’d very much like to think I’m leaving less of a mess for people who’ll someday have to work with the forms I’m constructing now.

For fuck’s sake.

politics, Uncategorized

Happy Fourth of Something.

About two-thirds of my life ago, I began to realize that what most people loudly and proudly call “patriotism” was just a mechanism they’d been raised with. Part of a ritual that distracted them from whatever deal they’d allowed their government to trade for their sweat and blood. As it has been since we learned to walk upright.

As someone very wealthy (and publicly devout) once said to my father-in-law over lunch on the other side of the world: “There are no countries. There are no religions. There is only business.”

If only more people realized this. The United States of America is a contract whose terms have changed over the past thirty years, and not for the better.

    Please sign the attached rider which commits your children and grandchildren to sacrifice their lives while killing people who signed a far worse contract with their own leadership. Note that your user agreement has been amended to modify those sections labeled “Bill of Rights,” “Social Security and Medicare,” and “Consumer Protection.”

Yes, we’re still getting a better deal for our money than a lot of folks elsewhere can ever look forward to. But that list is shrinking.

    Your apathy is greatly appreciated. We look forward to doing business with you and your DNA for the remainder of your lives.

Save your fervor for your loved ones. Reserve your faith for people you actually know.

politics, spew, Uncategorized

Today’s emails.

Autoreply from the office of Representative Partyhack Whiteman:

Thank you for taking the time to contact me. While I am fully consumed with the everyday activities necessary to make the ever-escalating promises that raise campaign funds from bigger corporate sources, your opinions are still very important to me.

Rest assured that all communications I receive are registered and sorted by my sycophantic office interns (who desire nothing more than to share in the benefits of my institutionalized influence-peddling and the money-laundering favors they provide me), and I will try to respond to you with a condescending, context-free reply as soon as possible.

Rep. Partyhack Whiteman