Another rite-of-passage milestone has been reached

I’m so proud. I’ve been called a “douchebag” no less than twice in the less-than-erudite comment thread on a very popular technology-satire blog. Yet another commenter chose to describe my suggestion to keep the satire focused upon facts (rather than stock-price-manipulative industry gossip) as “gay-ass.” 

Digg children, the online world is indeed your oyster. Please continue to attack anyone with vocabulary you’re too lazy to learn. 

I am so happy to be part of a culture which celebrates this level of discourse. Is anyone selling relocation-to-Canada-package services for disaffected faux intellectuals, or are there degree requirements for repatriation? 

I guess it’s a good thing the equally-illiterate baby Trekkies I normally converse with are so relatively polite. All they do is pout and passively digress entire discussion threads into a mewling rat-hole.

As for the satirical blogger… he’s lost a bit of focus since he became famous. Possibly since he found that the hits go way up when he posts about easy targets that his comment mob can dogpile upon. Smart commentary about the business world has taken a back seat to “let’s add a caption to this image of someone we hate” contests.

Nice work if you can get it. 


Nuggets of Contrition

Leo Laporte apologizes for having whined. Reason and fact largely prevail in an excellent MacBreak Weekly, wherein actual information is assessed, and the manifold opinions of the mobile phone user community are placed in context within a far-ranging meta-conversation between Leo and his guests Alex Lindsay, Andy Ihnatko, Chris Breen, and Merlin Mann.

Seems that the available evidence of recent post-update iPhone dysfunction includes non-hacked phones as well as those which were tinkered upon. And had Apple truly meant to punish heretics, they probably would’ve done a more precise job of it.

Whew. Now if only George Ou would go back to dancing.


There must be something in the water. Has the Joker escaped from Arkham?

Two of the last places I look for rationalism and accuracy in the Mac tech community have succumbed to what I can only interpret as some form of viral Britneyism, conveyed in the form of creeping self-entitlement, and expressed as godawful, presumptuous whining. Someone has tainted the water supply. Activate the Bat-signal!

Both Leo Laporte and the editors of Macworld/Playlist magazines, individuals I’d normally rely upon for sober and factual discourse, have recently posted podcasts full of anger and churlish pouting over the results of Apple’s recent software update to the iPhone.

All of these gentlemen, individuals I’ve normally associated with factual analysis of—and dispassionate objectivity to—Apple products, seem to have suddenly turned into representatives of the whiner population. You know those folks… the ones who sue a fast-food restaurant chain after spilling coffee on themselves. The people who paid full retail for a new consumer electronics gizmo, and then bleated like sheared sheep when its price dropped, even though they’d very likely already gotten their early-adopter bragging time.

Now some of these odd ducks are squealing because, after having tinkered with this device, they’ve found it no longer works properly, because one in a series of promised software updates has disabled it.

Whether it turns out that Apple could have been less aggressive with their update’s “reset,” I have a few questions for the most vocal of these people… specifically Rob Griffiths and Leo Laporte… because I’m baffled by their anger over this issue.

Where in the feature list or tech specs for the iPhone did it ever say you were at liberty to modify the functionality of the device to add unsanctioned applications?

Did your overview of the consumer technology space somehow empower you to presume that anything with a chip in it is infinitely subject to hobbyist tinkering, without consequence?

Did you find it impossible to wait until Apple had acquired more than a few months’ experience in a new consumer category, maintaining their side of iPhone functionality, before taking matters into your own hands?

Is the practice of conflating separate issues (lack of “third-party” apps, limitations on ringtone licensing, single-provider availability, read-only Notes, etc.) too tempting to overlook as you echo-chamber the “Apple is the new MS” slogan?

Does calling the iPhone a “platform” make it one, despite the fact that it’s not yet available to you as such?

It’s alarming to narrow my sources of sane information on this topic down to John Welch, John Gruber, and the Macalope. Late-adopters like me need more primary sources than that.

Disclosure: I’m an Apple shareholder.